Ultimate Bae

Bae

Noun; Before Anyone Else

Anyone is possible to be a bae to someone. Mine is my bestfriend, a guy who stepped into my world 7 years ago and has never walked out of the door (yet). I wish that will never happen, not until the very last breath.

Either his or mine.

He came into my life and little did I know, I have built a home in him. A home that could sooth me just by its presence. A home that could provide me comfort just by listening to its voice. A home that could effortlessly put me at ease after all the restless days I have encountered. A home that I have been longing for every time I seek for consolation.

A home that I would always crave for.

He is the first person I would turn to at my hardest times, the first person I would look for at happy moments. I like how we rarely talk to each other but still manage to pick up on each other’s life as how we left it before; as there isn’t a day that has passed without us talking to each other. I like how we call each other from time to time, and the fact that he knows he is actually helping me to keep myself sane by doing that. I like how he would be able to find the sadness in my voice and say, “What’s wrong? I can tell just by your voice” although I sometimes try to cover it up. I like how he listens to my ramblings and nags me about boys anytime he thinks he should. I like how he acts like he couldn’t care less yet becomes protective when the occasions require him to be so. I like how we’ll see each other sometimes without having someone else interrupting our moments. I like how he doesn’t pamper me with sweet shits and stuff but illustrates his love in his own way. Always manage to surprise me. I really appreciate the fact that he never says he would stay, but he did.

And it means the world to me.

Once, I asked myself out of curiousity (and because some people have been questioning me about this urgh it annoys me to the core ffs), “Do I love him more than a friend?”. Yes, I admitted to myself. I love him more than a friend, he is more than a friend to me. Yet the truth I have acquired in me is – everything I feel of him is completely platonic. There is absolutely zero romantic feeling involved and I am 110% sure of it. I felt a pang of relief as soon as I confirmed that because I myself, was worried that I might ruin this whatever bond we have. This bond is priceless to me and I don’t plan of destroying it, ever.

To You,

Hello, big guy. You know who you are. You know that I am your number 1 fangirl and will always be that way so you sometimes don’t even bother to keep your reputation clean in front of me because you do know that I will always feel the same way towards you no matter what. You know that I cherish you so much that I would like to have you as my best man – or my groom’s (I would fight him just to make him gives this pleasure to you) – on our wedding day later. You are so important to me that if one day, I would be lying down in the hospital’s bed out of sickness as I did before, I really hope you could rush back to spend some time visiting me. Because, my man, seeing you helps. Your presence is vital. That is how important you are to me. I do realise that the feeling isn’t mutual, but then again, I am a selfish person. A greedy one. So, help me. Stay. And please don’t get married before me. 

Your Number 1 Fangirl, 

Caek-chan

But he will never read this, because he doesn’t read my blog lmao.