Confession #15

I have been trying to figure myself out lately.

There were times when all I ever wanted to do was to shut down and kept distance from everyone that I didn't even bother to socialize with any human being- Why? Because I had too many things running in my mind but I didn't bother to share it with people.

There were times when I felt extremely sad that all I could do was grieving, crying and wept my tears away but I didn't want to spill it to anyone even though I knew they were right there, waiting for me to spill and would back me up no matter what- Why? Because talking about things that screw my mind would make things too real and I couldn't handle that, yet.

There were times when I felt the needs to talk to someone but at the very same time, I didn't want to talk to anyone- Why? Maybe because the ones who were there were not the ones who could give me the comfort that I craved for.

I am still trying to figure myself out; trying to answer the mysteries I have in me and the unsolved riddles. Life is complicated enough, and self being complicated too is not helping at all.